Disbelief

Have you ever seen something which you know is so wrong yet you can't do anything about it? You're aching to do something to correct the situation but you can't and you shouldn't cause it's not your situation to correct. I found out something that made me feel that way today, I was extremely frustrated, annoyed, angry, upset, most importantly sad. I wanted to scream, I wanted to kick, but I couldn't.

I have always believed that I had a very good head on my shoulder when it comes to relationships. My first one lasted 3 years and Ruy and I are anticipating our 6th year. No cheating, no screaming, no beating...so far my batting average has been pretty good. I don't claim to be a relationship expert though, I know I can goof up every once in a while but there are things that I learned in Psychology and in my personal experience which have been very accurate:

- when you are head over heels in love, step back and listen to your friends and family they see things you can't see through your rose colored glasses

- the best indication of present and future behaviour is past behaviour. though we'd like to think otherwise

- shame on you if you fool me once, shame on me if you fool me twice.

- in the end, you are the only one responsible for getting hurt again. why did you stay?

- the best indication of a healthy relationship is how much you can tell your friends. too many secrets means something is not right. nothing shameful about love, that is if there is love.

I'm writing this with gritted teeth, feeling extremely powerless. Just know that no matter what I'll be here, and I'll shut up from this point on.